


When the Weapon Can't Protect Its Family

by Shane_for_Wax



Category: Marvel, X-Men (Comicverse)
Genre: F/M, Gen, Minor Character Death Mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-28
Updated: 2015-11-28
Packaged: 2018-05-03 19:50:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 390
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5304569
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shane_for_Wax/pseuds/Shane_for_Wax
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Logan thinks about the fact that Itsu's death was his fault and he never even knew he had a son-- Daken-- until he showed up with hate in his heart for his father.</p>
            </blockquote>





	When the Weapon Can't Protect Its Family

Logan had almost envied how most other mutants could get drunk. He tended to need to drink a lot in a short amount of time to get anything close to drunk. But when he managed, he managed. 

The anniversary of Itsu’s death meant that he was drowning in the bottle, as it were. He did and always would blame himself no matter what anyone said. It was his fault. If he had never met her, never fallen in love, never… she would have stayed alive so much longer. 

And then to add insult to injury, she had been pregnant and he never knew. He had never smelled it on her.

Sometimes when he was really angry, really depressed, he would track Bucky down but would always back off at the last second before detection because Bucky hadn’t been totally at fault either. He’d killed Itsu, yes. But he hadn’t been Bucky at the time. He hadn’t been the kid who was constantly threatening Logan behind Steve Rogers’s back. 

“D’you have any idea… what’s it like to be fighting for your country only to be unable… to protect your own damn family?” he should’ve been there. Why hadn’t he been there? Why was there always another fight dragging him away? Why did he have to be dragged kicking and screaming back into the fold? Why wasn’t he allowed to be happy?

“Logan–” Ororo began to protest but the man shook his head. 

“I can only kill, I can’t protect. Is that the whole thing now? Keep your weapon honed by keeping it on the path you want? Not what he wants? It wants?” It was easier to think of himself as an object. It was what they wanted anyways. Objects didn’t have families or emotions. They had a job to do. That was it. 

“You are no mere tool or weapon, dear. You are a man with a kind soul who tries to do what’s best. That is all. None of this has been your fault, Logan.”

Blue eyes peered up silently before letting out a breath. 

“I should’ve stayed. I felt in my gut something was going to happen… and it did.”

“You cannot predict the future any better than any psychic real or imagined.”

“No, but I should learn from my mistakes by now.” Why were there so many?


End file.
